Dating Coach’s Controversial Comments: Do You Agree?

Tue, Sep 7, 2010


Are feminists to blame for the lack of “real” men today? That is what one Dutch dating coach is saying. Dennis Miedema found himself in a battle of words when he was criticized by a feminist group, who said it is manipulative for guys to learn techniques about how to meet women.

The Dutch dating coach was asked about the comments in a radio interview and responded with the idea that there are innate differences between the sexes, in that men naturally lead the way and are dominant while women have nurturing instincts and desire to be led. Miedema cited examples of women liking a gentleman who opens doors and gestures for them to walk through, or similarly pulls out a chair and invites them to sit.

He continued on to say that as feminists have argued for equality of the sexes in place of these traditional roles, men feel guilty for taking the lead and displaying sexual interest in approaching women. As a result, women have found men less and less attractive as they have failed to display classic dominant characteristics.

Is this much ado about nothing? Or are these truly offensive comments? On the one hand, you can see how women like a guy who takes charge, but on the other hand, there is always give and take. One way to find out could be to look at how successful Miedema is at his job. If his students succeed in attracting women with this philosophy, doesn’t it lend some credibility?

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3 Responses to “Dating Coach’s Controversial Comments: Do You Agree?”

  1. Tina T Says:

    Men and women are different, and not just physically. Most women want a man to take the lead whether they admit it or not. Think about all those women who won’t date a guy that is “too nice” this is just code for a man who doesn’t assert himself, which most women find unattractive.
    Tina T´s last blog post ..Avoiding Arguments in Relationships


  2. Brianna S Says:

    I do believe women are naturally submissive. I myself and attracted to a man that takes charge and dominates me, which is not to be confused with beating or any kind of abuse as feminists seem to think. I believe feminism suppresses nature, which is also why divorce is so common in todays world. Men should be men and women should be women. We were not created equal. Men and women each have their own strengths and weaknesses and even our physical bodies are made different for a reason.


  3. Janet Says:

    This Dutch guy is full of it; not a real subtle intellect there, and it’s not just because he’s a reactionary. I’ve been a feminist for more years than I care to say; I’ve had dates, boyfriends, & husbands, and am currently extremely happy w. a longterm partner. In my experience and that of friends of my generation (in our 50s), the statements you quote are completely false. — Now, maybe he’s talking about people with only a high school education. Such men might be more insecure; I wouldn’t know.


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