Discerning the Difference Between “Yes” and “No”

Thu, Jun 17, 2010


It is hardly a revelation to men reading this that women are often hard to read. Navigating the often contradictory utterances and subtle body language embedded within modern dating rituals can prove to be a daunting task. Nowhere is this more pronounced than the seconds just prior to the first instance of intimacy. This intrinsically awkward moment is further exacerbated by the machinations which occur in the female mind when hormones begin to battle against dictates of restraint instilled since she was a child. She wants to be with you, but she first needs to rationalize the act within her own mind.

This phenomenon often leads to laments such as “I really shouldn’t be doing this” or “I better stop”. Do these type of statements constitute a firm command for you to stop? It is often hard to tell. Oftentimes, these are momentary bouts of hesitation allowing for the rationalization process to complete before she fully gives herself to you. Conversely, in other instances, it could be sudden realization that she is not yet ready to be intimate with you, and she truly desires you to stop. In either scenario, it is wise to briefly pause and let her thought process play out. Trying to talk her into it or sell her on the idea like you are hawking a used car at this point can only prove be counterproductive. Give her a minute to think — you’ll increase the odds of her hormones winning the battle.

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